Fire in the Sky

So, the Mets stomped the D-Backs for the millionth straight time last night, winning 9-4 in the desert. Yeah, they needed to do it with a comeback against the closer, Jose Valverde. This brings their win streak in Phoenix to 11 straight, scoring 93 runs against 24 allowed during that run.

But why, exactly do the Mets like playing at Chase Field (nee Bank One Ballpark, nee a sandy hole in the ground) so much?

The park's dimensions suit their hitters

Sure, this is part of it. Chase goes 376 to both right- and left-center, but pulled back to 412 near the centerfield fence. This makes it both a good extra-base-hit park for teams that like to hit the gaps (the Mets), and a good home run park for teams that like to turn on the ball (the Mets). Shpigel sez they like the black batters' eye as well, so take that into consideration.

They like the weather

Are you kidding me? Los Mets love to soak up some early-season rays out in the pre-summer sun. Ron and Gary were saying during the broadcast last night just how perfect it was there -- 85 degrees, no wind, no humidity, clear skies ... nothing more you could ask for. After an April spent wearing ski masks and huddling together in the dugout for warmth, anyone could get down with a heat wave. Well, this is the perfect time for a four-game set in Arizona.

They like their hotel

Could be. Ron also mentioned this during the broadcast last night, that the hotel the Mets (and their broadcasters, natch) get put up in during the series is so luxurious with its spas and amenities and such that he thinks its a trick by D-Backs management to get the team over-comfortable. Hah! Talk about your all-time backfires. I'm pretty sure he said the hotel was the Arizona Biltmore, which is easily one of the nicer places in the country. Frank Lloyd Wright was a consulting architect on the structure, which looks exactly like his shit and has picked up various arts and crafts windows and doodads over the year to become more Wrightish. Seeing as how there are no other Wright hotels in existence, this one (though it really isn't one) soaks up all that credit. It's on a golf course, right next to a spa, and 20 minutes from the field. I'd like playing there too.

Tommy the Spy has a thing for cacti

This I'm not sure about, but it can't be ruled out as a possibility. Dude is 8-1 with a career 1.76 ERA in Phoenix, and that's including last night's deserved no-decision. Arizona catcher Chris Snyder hit an awful pitch from Glavine out for a two-run homer, and Tommy didn't really merit a win yesterday. That's a clear deviation from the norm, which is him turning into Walter Johnson while he's in-state. God help everyone if he ever decides to compete in the Grand Canyon State Games.

It's a convenient place to pick up steroids smuggled over the border

Kirk Radomski knows his business, and this is where to make the pickups. The Mets never played in Phoenix while he was with the team, seeing as how the D-Backs weren't yet in existence, but people get to talking, and sooner or later, everyone knows where the hot spots are. Guess what? They're 'round here. No wonder everyone walks around with smiles on their faces all the time.

By the way, the Radomski thing was yet another embarassment to the walking, talking joke that is Steve Phillips. He wasn't GM while Radomski was with the Mets, but he was sure as hell with the team during that stretch, and then later when probably a dozen of them were getting steroids from Radomski. He might as well have screeched out this quick ESPN column with the all-too-appropriate title, "If names are released, reputations might be ruined." Yeah, no shit. What about yours, Stevie?

I was often accused of being in the Mets' clubhouse too much during my years as general manager (1997-2003). I have to admit that I am hoping that there aren't any of my former players outed by this process as it would indicate that not only was I in the clubhouse too much but that I was also deaf and blind.

Heck, not a bad start. Of course, it's really a ground-softening move for when we start seeing names like "Agbayani" and "McRae" in the headlines.

None of the above

Maybe it's a big secret. Maybe they all have secret desert mistresses, or they're all pumped about Sun playoff basketball, or Phoenix is where Jose Reyes' alien masters choose to communicate with their prime specimen. Who knows? That's why it's such a fun time of year ... you never know why the Mets are going to cruise, but you know they will. Now that's good living.