Y2K-U: Cousin Dan's Weekly Update

(Note: Sip will be in with a piece later this afternoon.)

Welcome back to Y2K-U, as we enter the conference season in college basketball. A lot of folks may not be huge fans of college hoops in January and February, but your humble correspondent adores this time of the year.

Give me as much Big Monday matchups between Georgetown and Syracuse and Texas and Oklahoma State with the snow on the ground. Although Louisville-Marquette in the Big East yesterday? Kinda weird, ya know, for that to be in the Big “East.”

1. Meet the new No. 1, same as the old No. 1:

Look who’s back at the top of the polls! It’s Florida again, thus continuing the Greatest Major College Sports Year Ever© in Gainesville. The scary thing about Florida is that there really are only a few teams out there who can play lockdown defense and still get theirs at the offensive end, and the Gators lead that pack.

Joakim Noah, Al Horford, and Corey Brewer have the NBA scouts excited by their abilities on the defensive end as anything else.

2. Exhibit A of who won’t play defense in March:

I wasn’t really paying attention to the game on Saturday, but apparently North Carolina lost a game to Virginia Tech something on the order of 135-130. Virginia Tech thus became the first team in several years to beat UNC and Duke in the same week. The Tar Heels want to run and run, but fundamental defense wins in March, and the Official ESPN Second Greatest Coach In The Game Today has his work cut out for him in Chapel Hill.

3. Apropos of nothing in March:

Meanwhile, across the Commonwealth, my beloved Virginia squad has lost two more in a row on the road. Of course, it’s death, taxes, and Virginia losing outside Virginia, where the Cavs haven’t won a Division I game since 2005. (Seriously!) All I can note from those two road losses is that the opponents shot 88 free throws to Virginia’s 30, and leave it at that.

4. Exhibit A of who will play defense in March:

Well, pretty much most teams in the Pac-10 not named Arizona and Washington, which is part of the reason why it’s the toughest conference in the country. UCLA and Washington State are two of the best lockdown squads out there, and the landmines are everywhere you look on the only true round-robin conference schedule left.

It is notable that you will hear nothing about the Pac-10 because of their asinine contract with Fox Sports Net, so that ESPN – who sets the sporting agenda – will never bring College Gamenight to UCLA-Arizona. Or even put the highlights in the A, B, or C blocks of SportsCenter.

5. Besides, those blocks are full with breaking down Jon Scheyer’s sweet stroke:

As expected, Duke lost its first road game last Wednesday, leading to more teeth gnashing over just how this great group, led by Mr. Not-A-Coach, Just-A-Leader Who-Happens-To-Coach could possibly ever lose two straight games. News flash: they’re not that good.

But be sure to read Vitale’s incredible paean entitled “Fear Blue Devils”. Because “anyone who thinks Duke has fallen is wacky.” That’s right. It’s us who are wacky.

6. Other top five teams “rolling”:

Kansas and Wisconsin have also continued their strong play to remain in the top-five in the polls this week, although the Jayhawks and Badgers have won their last four games by a combined 16 points.

KU has been particularly heart-stopping of late, including a 3-point win over Missouri yesterday night in which freshman guard Sherron Collins had seven of the last nine Kansas points in the final 2 ½ minutes.

In other news, Sherron Collins has been approved as an official potential “baby daddy” by the wife. In still other news, I should have taken Mizzou and the 15 ½ to soften the possibility of being dumped.

7. Ginn Jr. questionable (celebration):

One thing that may have been lost in Florida’s dismantling of Ohio State was the fact that Ted Ginn Jr. was hurt by his own guy in the post-kickoff-return orgy in the back of the end zone. On the bright side, there were far fewer burning pieces of furniture in Columbus last week.

8. Thanks for promoting me from high school coach to SEC offensive coordinator, and I shall reward your loyalty:

In the agate yesterday was the item that Arkansas offensive coordinator Gus Malzahn, who was coaching high school 12 months ago, decided to take the same job at Tulsa for a new head coach, Todd Graham.

You may remember Malzahn as the guy who was hired to get his high school quarterback Mitch Mustain, the number 1 prospect in the country in 2005, to come be a Razorback. Why he left, beyond the $1,000 raise he got, is beyond me, and allegedly the quarterback may follow him to Tulsa. Given that this was the infamous “parents of freshmen complaining to athletic director about playing time” situation, I can’t even figure out the right jokes on this one.

9. “I don't regret it because I would never try and just go down on the (ground). I want to score.”

That’s Charger CB Marlon McCree, who pretty much cost San Diego a spot in the AFC Championship game when he didn’t (a) knock down a fourth-down pass, or (b) just fall down with the interception in the waning minutes Sunday. Patriots players don’t necessarily want to score. They just want to win. And that’s why they’re moving on.

10. Final Question:

No, seriously, Dickie V…it’s us who are wacky?

- Cousin Dan

(Images courtesy of scout.com)