More Stompings, Please

Still watching? Sure you are. The Series is all tied up, 1-1. Let's go Tigers.

With pine tar on his hands and hatred in his heart, the Gambler threw up his third consecutive brilliant performance last night, running his scoreless innings streak to a Lew Burdette-like 23. Go Tigers.

Advantage to the hosts for Game 3, probably, with Chris Carpenter pitching in his own place (where he's generally unbeatable) against Nate Robertson. Go Tigers.

Not a slam-dunk choice to root for Detroit, as it happens. We were going over this last night with F./M.O.A.F.O.M.G. and a few others. In this situation, as in all situations where your team gets bumped out of the race, you've got competing interests to balance.

Do you hate on the foe what knocked you out of the playoffs? Or do you feel vindicated if that team wins, thus confirming that you were in the way of a team of destiny?

In the case of the Tigers, do you get down with their youthful moxie and hopeful turned-it-around vibe? Or are you sick to your stomach of the "The American League is the most dominant League since the Justice League" storyline, and pushing for the NL rep to make a mockery out of that? Is that NL pride, or something a little more spiteful?

Do you make a stand against nonsense like the Commutative Property of Matchups (i.e., the Yankees swept the Sox, and the Sox beat up on the Mets, therefore the Yankees could whip the Mets, and I want to beat you senseless with a piano stool)? You should.

Lot of different things to think about, yes. And I'm sure if you stuck two dozen Mets fans in a room and did the whole "Who ya got?" and "Why?" routine (hat tip: PTI), you'd get 24 different takes. No problems there.

I can say with confidence, though, that I know which hoss I'm backing. It's the fierce, man-eating horse housed by the murder capital of the USA; it's the nag that eats little birdies for breakfast; the beaten-down mustang coming right at your ass from the far side of the paddock. He looks like he hasn't been fed in weeks, and you're wearing a cardigan made out of carrots.

Go Tigers.

And really, fuck the Cardinals. Y2K is really not pleased with them, any way you slice it. After getting to see all their faults and foibles on display in a seven-game series, there's just too much to piss us off there.

Eckschtein is a joke. Rolen's a whiny bitch. Preston Wilson, try as he might, is actively helping the other team. Pujols? This is a guy who's going to be inducted into the most prestigious club of all some day, and he can't find the number at Hair Club for Men. That's just sad.

LaRussa's irritating qualities are the stuff of legend. Jeff Weaver is determined to never find out that he's no good at baseball. And so forth. Very hateable in the abstract.

But then, the Cards went and tipped the scales over. Just mangled them up entirely, really. They did so after most of us had flipped off the television at the conclusion of Game 7. We didn't really need to stick around to watch their champagne celebration. If we had, though, we would have seen the St. Louis players and clubhouse types stick a dagger in the sides of the Mets organization and its fans.

Metsblog had the link on Friday, with audio, and Cerrone describes it thusly: "while celebrating their victory over the Mets in the visitor’s locker-room at Shea Stadium, the Cardinals sang “Jo-se, Jose, Jose, Jose," the chant given to Jose Reyes, by Mets fans, which they sang all season long..."

Metsblog sez: "ouch." I say: "Low blow, assholes. You're going to get yours."

Oh, man, this just sticks in my craw something awful. Ragging on a fun, participatory cheer that gets people excited and involved in the game is one thing. It's bad for baseball. It's unsporting. It's a dick move that only a team full of flameouts (not you, bald Albert), managed by a grubby, bitter old hack, could have come up with.

But to get on Reyes, a guy who literally doesn't know how to say a bad word about anyone? That's actually kind of offensive. Why not encourage enthusiastic kids to stay home from the ballpark while you're at it? Jeff Suppan says, "The NBA needs fans too!" Yay!

Anyway, rather than let this turn into even more of a rant than it already is, I'll cut myself off here, having passed on the knowledge that the Cardinals are a singularly unpleasant and dishonorable group of punks. I wish I had type to yell about Yadier Molina, but hey, that's life.

Piss off, Cardinals. Go Tigers. If possible, calm down, Cheddar Ben.