SFSM?
So a lot of great things happened to old Sip this weekend. On Friday night at the Warriors game(my new squad) big Maciej and I were in the VIP area (that's what they do for bloggers out West) when I see this giant dude.
The guy is 6'7, 6'8 at least and ginormous. CC Sabathia. It has to be, I think to myself. Only this guy is wearing a Yankee hat.
So I go up to him. "Yo, what's up CC?"
"Chillin, chillin," he responds.
"Alright man, I'm a big Tribe guy have a great season."
I do love the Indians. They are defintely my #2 in baseball. I'm proud to have been on board with them for a couple of years now and I really think they are the best team in baseball next year.
But this brings me to my problem. The fucking Yankees hat.
Here is OBF CC, arguably the coolest guy in baseball, rocking a Yankees hat. What have we become? How is this OK? This dude is an Indian, but he's wearing another team's hat.
It made me sick. I sat there and watched a devastating 4th quarter in which the Warriors blew what should have been a huge win, but all I could thing about was CC. Whats next, David Wright in a Kobe Bryant Jersey?
When I studied abroad, everyone in Ireland wore Yankee hats. I would tell all of them that that is what "gay" people did in the states, because they are very homophobic out there and I wanted them to stop. Still, it fucking killed me.
So we're in the players bar after the game. I talk to a member of J-Ric's entourage about how Derek Fisher is a huge chucker and he drops me one of the more comprehensive pounds I have seen since my middle school thug days.
I'm at the bar, grabbing drinks for me and my new SF crew when I see old CC. He comes to the bar so I order him a beer. I offer it to him but he thinks I am toasting him.
Im like, "Nah, CC, for you man. Have a great season."
He amazingly responds, "Yo, so where's the club at tonight?"
Unfortunately we were going out to SF while he was going out in Oaktown so we parted ways.
But all I could think about is how much I wish I had confronted him.
Would I have fought CC? Heck no. This guy is a giant and trumps me in coolness like Steve Sanders would do to Screech Powers. But it killed me.
I watched "Fight Club" yesterday and thought about one of the first assignments of Project Mayhem. That is, to pick a fight with a total stranger.
Well as you may or may not have realized, I have written this blog because I am trying to create a Tyler Durden like army.
So my first assignment for you guys, in Project "Cousin Evan is God" is this: I want you to pick a fight with a complete and total stranger, with one catch. He, or maybe better she, has to be wearing a Yankees hat.
Only unlike in "Fight Club", I don't want you to lose. You need to kick the ever living shit of your opponent.
Or, if that's just a little too violent for you, I suppose it would probably be alright just to scowl in his or her direction really hard.
Anyway, I write this blog at 8:41PM Pacific time and football is winding down. Today was one of the more bizarre days of my life. I missed Blondies and I missed having the day being over after the 4:00 games. I am really drunk and tired right now after a long day of my first Sunday watching football on the west coast.
It's a weird feeling but let just say I miss you all back home.
Still having a great time. SF welcomes all Yankees2000 fans.
You gotta go down!!! People trusted you and they died!
SM
The guy is 6'7, 6'8 at least and ginormous. CC Sabathia. It has to be, I think to myself. Only this guy is wearing a Yankee hat.
So I go up to him. "Yo, what's up CC?"
"Chillin, chillin," he responds.
"Alright man, I'm a big Tribe guy have a great season."
I do love the Indians. They are defintely my #2 in baseball. I'm proud to have been on board with them for a couple of years now and I really think they are the best team in baseball next year.
But this brings me to my problem. The fucking Yankees hat.
Here is OBF CC, arguably the coolest guy in baseball, rocking a Yankees hat. What have we become? How is this OK? This dude is an Indian, but he's wearing another team's hat.
It made me sick. I sat there and watched a devastating 4th quarter in which the Warriors blew what should have been a huge win, but all I could thing about was CC. Whats next, David Wright in a Kobe Bryant Jersey?
When I studied abroad, everyone in Ireland wore Yankee hats. I would tell all of them that that is what "gay" people did in the states, because they are very homophobic out there and I wanted them to stop. Still, it fucking killed me.
So we're in the players bar after the game. I talk to a member of J-Ric's entourage about how Derek Fisher is a huge chucker and he drops me one of the more comprehensive pounds I have seen since my middle school thug days.
I'm at the bar, grabbing drinks for me and my new SF crew when I see old CC. He comes to the bar so I order him a beer. I offer it to him but he thinks I am toasting him.
Im like, "Nah, CC, for you man. Have a great season."
He amazingly responds, "Yo, so where's the club at tonight?"
Unfortunately we were going out to SF while he was going out in Oaktown so we parted ways.
But all I could think about is how much I wish I had confronted him.
Would I have fought CC? Heck no. This guy is a giant and trumps me in coolness like Steve Sanders would do to Screech Powers. But it killed me.
I watched "Fight Club" yesterday and thought about one of the first assignments of Project Mayhem. That is, to pick a fight with a total stranger.
Well as you may or may not have realized, I have written this blog because I am trying to create a Tyler Durden like army.
So my first assignment for you guys, in Project "Cousin Evan is God" is this: I want you to pick a fight with a complete and total stranger, with one catch. He, or maybe better she, has to be wearing a Yankees hat.
Only unlike in "Fight Club", I don't want you to lose. You need to kick the ever living shit of your opponent.
Or, if that's just a little too violent for you, I suppose it would probably be alright just to scowl in his or her direction really hard.
Anyway, I write this blog at 8:41PM Pacific time and football is winding down. Today was one of the more bizarre days of my life. I missed Blondies and I missed having the day being over after the 4:00 games. I am really drunk and tired right now after a long day of my first Sunday watching football on the west coast.
It's a weird feeling but let just say I miss you all back home.
Still having a great time. SF welcomes all Yankees2000 fans.
You gotta go down!!! People trusted you and they died!
SM
posted by Sippy Momo at 11:23 PM
1 Comments:
Okay, a scenario: one of your readers, some drunk, yankee-hating, overweight, still-living-at-home, unemployed, 28-year old, virgin loser is out one night, walking home after a long night of being creepy and pathetic at a bar, sees an innocent guy strolling along in a brand new yankees hat. He's drunk and extremely repressed so it's no surprise when he suddenly remembers your newest blog and instantly snaps into a violent rage, killing the yankees fan. Cut to one hour later, he's sitting in the police station explaining to the detective what you had instructed him to do on your blog. The DA gets this information, and decides to charge you with murder...maybe manslaughter in the first degree, criminaly liable. I watch law and order, it happens. Anyway, cut to six months later, you're a "prag" (prison-fag, thank you, OZ) being worked over by your cell mate that strangely resembles in every way, the "ginormous" CC Sabathia. It is now that you chuckle at the irony and circularity of life.....your chuckle is quickly cut-off by the excruciating pain of being ass raped.
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